Dreams: Changing Others Impressions of You

- Lava Development
- Missionary
- Big White Truck
- DeeDee Walters
- Ryan King
- Changing the perception others have of you
- two piles

This one is interesting. Not sure if I remember how it starts, but at some point, I return to being a missionary for the LDS church (although it is a more liberal mission that what the little white bible currently dictates). In this mission, the Elders live in sets of four, they bring their own vehicles to the mission if they want, and they can wear kahki pants and shorts with their shirts and ties. They can even have opposite gender visitors to their apartments, as long as the mission president knows about it and it's only one person at a time.

My companion in the Lava Hot Springs area has a huge white pick-up truck, and the four of us are talking about a mother and her two kids that we are teaching in the upper mountainous area of Lava Hot Springs, toward Topance Creek. For some reason, DeeDee Walters is at the house, and asks if I was the one who did something to Rosie in high school. I can't hear what she is asking, so I ask her to repeat it. It has something to do about flowers or a date or something, and I finally say "Yes, that was me." To which, she replies, "That was so sweet of you."

In the meantime, the president has called to send my companion and I on a trip to see the investigator. We jump into his big white truck and pull out of the garage, which is part of a white brick house. We are both worried the truck won't clear the doors because of the cab and the mirrors, but it does. We drive through the town of Lava, and I am surprised to see how much development has occurred. For example, there is a big hotel going up on the east end of town where camp grounds currently are. There are also huge, square, soviet-style cement pits where old people are golfing and practicing rock climbing.

As we start driving off, I immediately think of Ryan King and wished he and I were boyfriends and that I could impress him. My companion starts telling me a story about how to change peoples perceptions of you. (Incidentally, this is the reason why I'm blogging this dream.) He talks of two separate piles of stuff. In the dream, these piles are made up of random things, and they are small--no larger than a turkey roasting pan. They are also sitting outside a two-door parking garage, similar to that of the Andrew's flat in Bournemouth, England.

He continues to talk about the piles:
- The location of the piles represent what people think of you.
- Both piles begin at the same starting line
- As you do things in life, the pile on the left moves incrementally toward the finish line. The right pile doesn't move at all.
- The finish line represents your final character, and people's acceptance of that character.
- The pile on the right (the first impression) doesn't move at all. It can be really horrible or really good, but it doesn't move or change.
- If you do something bad, idiotic, wrong, or ill-contrived, or silly, the pile on the left moves backward, or even goes to the reset point (starting line).
- Once the pile on the left makes it all the way to the finish line, then the pile of the right is automatically moved there as well. That's when your character is truly established.

Dreams: PSGG and Psychotherapy

Location(s): Unknown Residence of Future, Behavioral Health Center

Participants: Mother, Father*, Grandparents*, Boyfriend**, Family, Friends, Co-workers, Pink Streak Grunge Guy**

* Currently Deceased
** Representative Individuals (Not currently recognizable associates)

Time: Future / Past ?

Background: I'm usually asleep by 9:00 PM every night.

In this dream, I am having a rough time sleeping. It's 10:30 or 11:00 and the bf brings home Pink Streak Grunge Guy (hereafter refered to as PSGG). They get in bed and begin having sex (all the way past third base). Their stirring next to me wakens me, and I just pretend to sleep as they continue on in their endeavor.

Eventually, the bf gets up and goes to get a drink. PSGG then decides to engage me in sexual behavior of the homosexual variety. He has a streak of florescent pink hair in his head--more grunge based that effeminate. We begin to talk and he tells me that my husband won't have intercourse with me cause I've got some serious mental issues to resolve in my life.

I get up and walk down a long hallway to go get a drink of water and the dream fast forwards to a family dinner (location unknown). At the dinner, an intervention team comes in and takes me off to a behavioral health center. I go to what seems to be a 1000 therapy sessions, not really wanting to change, nor acknowledging that I need to change. My family visits regularly in a family room style of environment. They continue to point out my negativity and attitude among my behavioral problems.

After months of therapy, I have a break through. It's amazing. I start challenging every thought I have and have ever had. Simple things I didn't notice before about my behavior and speech now become apparent to me. It's a completely different outlook on life--but it's exhausting. So exhausting that it's easy to revert.

But I've seen the light and I want to move towards that different level of understanding. I'm still in the center, but I'm okay with it. I'm less negative on myself and less suicidal.

Dream Ends.

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